Thanksgiving

It has been a week since our neighbors lost their 1 month old baby girl. I feel a little less numb now. I can’t believe how much this affected me. I could not stop crying for days. I feel so bad for Mike too. He was the one giving CPR to a dead baby and yet he was trying to keep it together not to scare me. The day it happened when all was over and we both went back to bed (not being able to sleep of course) it was so quiet that we could hear our neighbor bawling. It was then when we both broke down and cried together for a while. It is not that we are very good friends with our neighbors, we have talked to the husband twice before. He also works all day and his wife was at home all day with a newborn baby and their two year old daughter. What hit us I think was the realization that life can be taken so easily, without warning. We have seen family member come and take their older daughter and also I have seen people taking a crib and baby stuff out of the house. Every time I see anything I start crying thinking how horrible must be to come home and see all of your baby’s stuff but no baby. I keep wanting to go see her but I feel that they need to be left alone for a while. I don’t even know what to say. I don’t think I am very good with people I don’t know. Hopefully I will gather enough courage and take them dinner or something.

The last three months have been very difficult for me. We have had to deal with our ex-neighbor Steve, who lost his job and wanted to live with us while he found something. Mike seemed to think that it was a good idea, but I obviously disagreed, which made Steve feel very bad, and me too. Long story short I let him stay here for a weekend while Mike was at home and the day he left he ask me to help him put his dog Bear to sleep. Bear is not dying although he is very old and kind of hard to take care of. Of course that hit a soft spot (animals) and I agree to keep Bear while he found something. It has been more than three months and Bear is still here, all 70 pounds of hairy, stinky, old and arthritic dog. His back legs are not working very well anymore, so since our floors are hard wood every time he falls I need to pick him back up, among other things. I know some of you know must be thinking that I should have let Steve put him down, but if know anything about me you know I am not putting a dog down just because he is now an inconvenience. I believe that if you are not willing to commit to a life time ownership of a dog and what it brings with it then you shouldn’t have a dog in the first place. I don’t think they are disposable. Steve is still living in a motel and has no job, so Bear has become a permanent piece of furniture at our home. At least he is cute. Added to the Bear and Steve issue was my totally awful all-day sickness.

This time morning sickness was worse than with Lisa, I am not going to go into details, but I will say that for now I am really thinking I am done with kids. It was that horrible. I think I am much better now. I am 20 weeks along and only threw up once this week. Yay for me! We will find out the sex of our baby tomorrow morning.

Thanksgiving was very nice. We were supposed to stay in Utah for a whole week, but after booking the flights Mike realized he needed to be back on Monday for a test and a final presentation for one of his classes. We came back the day after Thanksgiving. I keep trying to figure out why Heavenly Father wanted us to be here that night. Our neighbors had had a fight that night and the wife left the house in her husband’s car with his cell phone inside. That is why he could not call 911 by himself and needed to come ask for help from us. Mike keeps saying he feels horrible because it must have been so horrible to wake up to a sight like that of your unconscious baby and not being able to call somebody. What if we weren’t here? But then Mike couldn’t do anything for them except for calling 911 and giving the baby CPR because the dad was too distraught. I know it has to do with sharing the gospel but I am still puzzled. Anyway, we loved seeing everyone. As I write this down I am tearing a little thinking how much I miss our family. We love all of you deeply and we are happy that we had the opportunity to spend time with all of you. It makes me sad to see that Baby Lisa actually liked everyone and tried to keep up with her older cousins. A special mention to Avram for being so sweet with the babies. I am so impressed by how much he loves them, he wanted to play with them and help him, what a sweet boy. Pearl on the other hand did not enjoy Lisa’s presence all that much, I think is funny. Also thanks to Sherrie for opening her home to a bunch of destruction.

Lisa on the plane

I received my printed blog. Both Mike and I loved seeing all the pictures of our baby Lisa. I know I have said it before but I will try to be more consistent. Thanks Sherrie!

Here are some pictures from my cell phone. I haven’t been very good at taking pictures other than with my phone.

My Mexican baby eats Mexican candy

She was Frida Kahlo for Mexico's Independence Day

Trying out the kitty ears for Halloween

Lisa my love

BYU fans

at the petting farm

waking up

Our Halloween photo shoot was a disaster

Ella is such a cuddle bunny

I am going to close turn this blog to a private one so if you want to keep reading send me your emails please. I do not have a list and I don't really know who is reading it.